Breaking up is hard to do

A funny story about cancelling an AOL account:
When she answered, she asked why I was calling. Annoyed that I had already told the robot that I was canceling, I informed Marion of this as well. Marion gasped as if I had just stabbed her first-born in the chest, and asked me why I had chosen to do something this rash. I explained to her that I was in school now, and they had an ethernet connection and I didn't need AOL anymore. She kept protesting and interjecting with long speeches about keywords or live chat or some such nonsense, and then I would tell her again that I was canceling. I began to feel as if Marion and I had had a long, intimate relationship for the past couple years and I was breaking up with her.
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